Guess who bought a bottle of Absinthe while in Holland!! 

I just got back from the Netherlands. Although a wide variety of unusual buys are available to the discerning consumer I've become particularly entralled with the availability of Marijuana and Absinthe in the Netherlands.  

And people say I hate "new" music....

It doesn't get more new that this piece!!

Personally, if the entire Mozart anniversary year had featured more 'rewrites' like this one, I'd have enjoyed it much, MUCH more!!

http://www.fazed.org/video/?id=429

Doubtless, this is the instrumentation that Mozart would have used had he lived just a teensy bit longer......

A retrospective on my former job....

Now that I've been removed from my time at American Music Company, Inc. for a while, I'd like to point out some of my favorite customers over the years. I expect this to be a multiple-post series.

Please see the pic above. This woman is one serious voice teacher, and look out!!! She's got a microphone and knows how to use it.

I have no problem with the occasional pernikity comment, but some folks (i.e. the mugshot above) overtake the boundaries of occasional nastiness in less time than it takes me to type an email message. Miss Mary wasn't afraid to demand excellent service, even when her expectations were unreasonable or not in her best interest.

My favorite recollection of Miss Mary is the time she sent students into the store armed with only the basest information.

Student of Miss Mary: "I'm here to buy the Broadway Book"

Helpful Employee: "Which Broadway Book?"

SOMM: "The red one from Hal Leonard"

HE: "That's going to be difficult as Hal Leonard publishes several Broadway Collections, and I know of at least 3 of them that are red. Is there a particular title that you're looking for in that collection?"

SOMM: "Some piece by Rogers and Hammerstein"

As you can tell, Miss Mary is a fabulous teacher. She takes pride in instilling the specificity in her students that she demands from everyone else. Plus she looks damn fine with a microphone!

Entrance Exams, Part Deux!!

So I got the results of my exams.......results as follows:

RE: Hearing: I've been place in level 2 (which is actually level 3 when you consider that it begins with MUS 499 Into to Hearing, then Hearing I (MUS501) and then my class Hearing II (MUS 503) . Of course all the wickedly smart organists made it into MUs 549 - Advanced Hearing.

I've met the Prof. and she seems to be an absolute genius, and a bit nutty to boot. That's my kind of combo! One of her former students maintains a quote log, which should give you a bit of insight into her way of doing things. I'ts just enough Epley-esque that I think I'm going to be very engaged.

"I'm into glue these days."

"In the B section, the brass is no longer rocking on."

"This is not a lukewarm, namby-pamby cadence."

"This is an *especially* dominant 7th chord."

"This dominant 4/2 chord has four measures of concentrated detergent power."

"With respect to harmony, measure 5 is pungent."

"My, what a unique last name! No identity theft for you!"

"Could the three musketeers in the front row calm down a little bit?"

"I sound like I should be locked up!"

[upon seeing the desk arrangement in Parker Hall] "I feel like I'm up here and you're all out there like a bunch of bankers!"

"It's not about what I want. Well yes it is."

RE: Music History Exam

I was actually able to test out of the Survey of Music History course, thereby allowing me to choose my Music History credit from a large pool of options. Not surprisingly I've opted for MUS 588 - "Masterpieces of Music before 1750" which will focus on a slew of composers including my perennial favorites....Purcell, Tallis, Monteverdi, those sexy Franco-Flemish dudes, as well as a good smattering of the Italian masters.

So, it's kudos to ME!

Music Library Orientation

So here is the place where I'll be spending a LOT of time...... This is the Music Library!

Today began with a tour, which was cut short while we were in the stacks. Let me tell you about he stacks, Long 15 ft rows of metal shelves about 2 feet apart. Oh, it's dark! You have to push a little button and find your book or score before it automatically turns off.

So there we are, in the stacks when a light begins to flash and a very pleasant, slightly English voice says, "There is a reported fire emergency in the Library, please walk to the nearest exit and leave the building" Someone in our group said something about how nice that sort of fire alarm was, compared to the usual earsplitting shreik.......they had just gotten the sentence finished when the usual earsplitting shreik began.

So that's it for today....just a little, slightly funny anecdote!

Entrance Exams....

...were today. 4.5 hours of absolute mind numbing musical regurgitation.

However there are a few touchstones of sanity...

* at one point during the Music History exam, a loud siren began on the same pitch as the final chord of one of the "Identify " pieces. I'm pretty certain that the piece in question was a Mozart Concerto for Horn and Ambulance.

* at one point during the Theory exam the phrase "Identify the following" was used immediately before a difficult to read diminished 7th chord. For those of you who never had a theory exam with S. Emig, this will make no sense.

* at one point during the Dictation exam the phrase "fuck" could be audibly heard from several people at the same time.

* The two idiot soprani (obviously from the opera program) routinely turned in their sheets with NOTHING written down on them. NOTHING! I mean there's something to be said for an occasional guess. I mean I'm a moron singer, and I'll probably get stuck in the remedial class with the ditzy soprani, but c'mon! I mean you could've at least hazarded a guess.

* at one point during the history exam I got to show off my knowledge of the dates of Thomas Tallis, Hector Berlioz, Henry Purcell, and Giacomo Meyerbeer. I'm pretty sure I'm the only person that got Tallis' dates.

All in all, a good long day. I'm going into these exams expecting NOTHING, and I expect I'll get from them what I put in!

A 'brigham brigade' of Mormons?

Our new apartment is wonderful, and I'm particularly thrilled by the ethnic diversity of the place. I've met folks from Korea, Pakistan, Japan, China, Russia, Germany, and Nigeria. It's really cool. What's even cooler is the fact that Y*** University has made a commitment to diversity in ethnicity and religion. OR HAVE THEY.

My real complaint here is with the white folks, just like me. On the outside there would appear to be no problem with them, until I beging to connect the vacant look in their eyes and their apparent commitment to wildly wholesome activity. And then I see it, a BYU bumper sticker here, a Book of Mormon there, a pack of Mormons taking over my courtyard.......

Come to think of it, what's the term for a collection of Mormons? You know, like a gaggle of geese, or a murder of crows, or a herd of cattle.....

I hereby offer a damn fine cup of coffee to the person who comes up with the best term/descriptor for a pack of wildly indoctrinated cult members. And don't feel free to limit your replies to Mormons, I'd also consider good answers to find the collective term for a group of Southern Baptists, Old Money New Englanders (read: Yale Undergrads), and Organists.

There is some relief in the couple from Louisville we met last week. Normal folks, margarita drinking, tobacco (and other stuff) smoking, Kia driving folks just like me and Hammer.